Monday, September 1, 2008

I know I'm not fully certified yet but...

Here's some good medical knowledge and advice, straight from me to you:
1. Don't get fat. if you do get fat, don't let yourself get obese. if you do become obese, please stop growing before you become morbidly obese. 300 lbs is the limit past which Parkland Hospital can not do any type of imaging procedure (X-ray, CT scan, MRI, etc). For this reason, 300 lbs is colloquially termed the "Parkland Unit".
2. Don't smoke cigarettes. They are bad for you.
3. Don't do cocaine. Especially if you weren't able to follow the advice listed as #1. Or if you're on Beta-blockers. if you ignore this advice, it can be very hard to make sure you don't die.
4. Don't swallow razors or other pieces of metal in order to get a vacation from jail.
5. If you have a disease, don't deny it. Take care of yourself. If you have diabetes and can't feel your feet, you should probably look at them from time to time to see how they're doing. If you don't look at your feet, you may one day lose them.
6. If you come to the ER for non-emergent care because you don't have a regular physician and you want to be seen for free, please don't complain when people who are acutely ill are seen before you. Also, please don't complain that students are involved in your treatment. We're paying for the privilege to go to work every day.
7. It's our job to know a lot about science, but if you're really sick, it will take a long time for you to get better. This doesn't mean we're stupid or bad at our jobs.

One week down, seven to go. The upside is that I got labor day off because my resident is really nice and lovely and amazing. The downside is that whenever I am at work I feel like I've fallen through a time-warp rabbit hole where minutes stretch into hours and days run into one another. And it's incredibly frustrating to see people who are very sick with things that could easily have been prevented if they had taken care of themselves.

Totally looking forward to Surgery.

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